I am not a doctor nor familiar with any related laws so of course I don’t know what I’m talking about.

Is there a reason you couldn’t tell the parents “Of course, right away” and then ask them to leave the room? When they leave the room you could ask the daughter what answer she wants you to give the parents, then call them back in and give them that answer.

People who believe in virginity tests aren’t going to stop because you turned them away they will just continue until they get what they want. You might as well do the girl a favor and get those assholes off her back even if it is temporary.

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Im dying on it either way.

Then stick with windows 10, once you debloat it and disable all the privacy invasive shit its not the worst OS ever, that title belongs to javaOS. There is no perfect option. There will always be some downside you have to contend with.

Appliances and cars should never have an internet connection for any reason.

Also fuck touch screens give me buttons.

I never had either issue using Bazzite. Theres a distro for almost everything find the one that works for you.

“non-working webcams” sounds like a plus IMO but I get your point.

P.S theres a reason I used “almost”

Just buy a laptop, stop trying to complicate the process. The great thing about linux is that it runs fine on almost anything.