This isn’t rage bait. There are a lot of tech workers on Lemmy and it’s likely that someone that works at Google could see this and fix the issue.

Agree with everything you said btw

There’s a difference between thinking that male victims of domestic abuse don’t deserve sympathy or support, and thinking that it’s okay for “useful search results” to vary according to gender.

The results are biased because the danger is biased.
It’s an unfortunate reality that information about domestic violence is more likely to be useful to a woman concerned about an angry male partner than the opposite.

That doesn’t minimize the suffering of men who do need support, it’s just putting information more likely to be useful first.
The domestic abuse hotline is the second result, and the first one also affirms that everyone deserves to feel safe in their relationships, and to calm the hotline if you don’t.

“My wife/husband hit me” both yield the same results, which makes sense.

All I’ve got to say is that I might begin to take female domestic abuse victims with a grain of salt if I’ve any suspicion they would treat male victims similarly. Because to many victims, it is obvious that it can happen to anyone and be perpetrated by anyone, regardless of gender of either. But if they say men can’t be abused, that just tells me that they have never experienced abuse and removes any credibility from anything they could possibly say about the subject.

On top of that, I can’t imagine why someone would even Google something like this outside of domestic violence related reasons. Are people really expecting to find out from google why their spouse is upset with them in a typical argument?

I’d say the de facto differences between the sexes is that one can kill their partner at the cost of sacrificing his own freedom in the process (believe it or not, straight to jail), while the other can utterly and entirely ruin the other’s life without any consequences at all, or even positive consequences like praise and recognition.

To me the both is from the same website as you got for “why is my husband yelling at me” (wellbeingscounselling.ca). woah, does this mean that my country is truly gender equal?

In Australia it shows the help is available for everyone but useing a VPN that’s in America it only triggers if a man is beating a woman

The second result I. The USA is the hotline too.

Many changes start with people posting about it, like it is very likely if this blew up Google would modify the search term to include the help line for both, so I disagree that it is bullshit in that regard regardless of OP’s intent

Thanks for minimizing the abuse I went through. Fuck you. Maybe a big part of why men are underrepresented in abuse statistics is because we are considered the abuser by default and are expected to just suck it up and take it. Go eat a bag of dicks, apologist.

Statistically speaking, however,

This way of looking at things is called collectivism. It’s the sort of philosophy that considers it okay to treat and individual according to the average experience of their group. For example, when someone points out that a woman can easily get help and a man is told to stop and consider his abuser’s needs, collectivism says “yeah but that man’s problem is smaller”.

Well, that’s the implication. That his problem is smaller than a woman’s problem would be.

It’s never actually said. Instead it’s described in terms of statistics and numbers. And these numbers describe the collective experience, not the individual experience.

OP is making a complaint from an individualist point of view: if a particular man is being abused, then that man faces significant obstacles in getting help.

Just because fewer men than women experience problem X, doesn’t mean that a man with problem X suffers less than a woman with problem X.

Dismissing the experience of the individual, or implying that it’s “bullshit” to highlight that individual experience (which is horrifying, as I know from being on one side of this issue, which is all the perspective I need to evaluate how horrible it feels and whether it’s okay).

People think the words collectivism and individualism map to:

Collectivism: considering others’ needs

or

Individualism: considering only one’s own needs

That’s not what those words mean. What they mean is:

Collectivism: Considering the needs of a group, and making ethical decisions based on group situation descriptors (such as statistics) and the implied sums of experience. Holding groups responsible, as a unit, for crimes. Recognizing groups, as a unit, for their accomplishments.

Individualism: Considering the needs of the individual, and making ethical decisions based on the individual’s situation (such as stories, relationships, health status, etc). Punishing or rewarding individuals for the actions they themselves committed.

But it’s not even a matter of policy primarily. It’s not like this policy is collectivist and that policy is individualist. Most prominently, these are lenses through which to view the world.

One of the dangers of collectivism is exactly this kind of reasoning (when collectivism is applied erroneously to individual policy or problem evaluation). Because more women experience X problem than men, we should prioritize the individual women’s problems over the individual man’s problems.

I am not accusing you of having said or implied the previous sentence

Now, collectivism isn’t bad or good. Individualism isn’t bad or good. The danger arises when one doesn’t distinguish between them. In the above italicized thought, for instance, a collective issue is used to make decisions about individual response. That’s not so good.

An example of good collectivist reasoning and ethics would be like: “After experimenting with different carbon tax rates, we have found that $65 per ton extracted results in the climate stabilizing”.

Collective problem, collective analysis (those atmospheric CO2 readings basically involve all of us), collective solution (a law, which applies to everyone in the group, i.e. all Earthers)

An example of good individualist reasoning and ethics would be like: “Mike is constantly yelled at by Susan. Almost every day, she goes off the handle and yells at him for hours. His health is suffering from this. Therefore we’re connecting Mike with a shelter and a social worker who’s going to help him learn that he’s too valuable to accept that treatment”

Collectivism, Individualism. Two lenses for looking at problems, just like physics and chemistry are two ways of looking at the world.

Yeah but if someone is searching “why is my wife/husband yelling at me,” the statistics on abuse for that sub-popularion may not be as skewed. And providing resources for men (especially men with children) doesn’t take Google that much more effort/money, and it provides a much needed service. As it stands, it is nearly impossible for an abused man (especially one with children) to seek out help using the types of services that are available for women. So if Google can help with that search a little bit, what’s the harm in showing that info? Aaand, even for someone searching about their abusive husband, the googler may be a man, and most services that are for abused women don’t have resources for men.

Streisand effect go!

He joined here to make chaos and disturb all peace lol

What are you talking about? The meme is that men can be abused and be yelled at and the problem sometimes is women. And you still flip it on men?

That’s helpful.

Yeah in backwater shithole cultures like Afghanistan or Saudi Arabia or even closer to (my) home like Mexico that are way behind the times, women can’t report abuse for fear of being disbelieved, gaslighted, minimized, shamed, shunned, disfigured or even killed for reporting abuse.

But the world has made some progress on that front for women.

For men, trying to get help for abuse in the USA he fears all those outcomes. For men, modern society is still in the dark about this.

Men routinely describe their wife being upset at them in any capacity as yelling at them.

That’s so funny, I had it in my head the exact opposite way. I feel like any time my voice stops being pleasant and friendly in a dispute with a woman, I immediately get accused of yelling at her.

Interesting that wife yelling requires fewer steps to stop

Imagine calling the suicide hotline, and telling them you wanted to tie a noose to catch a wild goat

Fuck. I need to go to Big Lots.

Question how does one adjust for ‘unreported events’. It’d be like 50% of the universe is female when adjusting for Alien Life forms.

Women kill men

😑👏